Unicorn Quest · #1

Greetings, curious reader. You have stumbled upon the Guide’s most unnecessary feature: a weekly contest devoted to sniffing out rare whiffs of originality in spaceflight.

Here’s how it works: below you’ll find three curious travelogue entries. Each describes something that actually exists, though written in the Guide’s usual mix of admiration, sarcasm, and cosmic confusion. Your task is to guess what they are. The answers will be revealed next week. Unless, of course, the planet explodes in the meantime, in which case the answers won’t matter.