How Many Shell Games Can One Airline Vendor Play?

Anuvu, the artist formerly known as Global Eagle, is flipping ownership again. This time, it’s heading into the loving arms of Platinum Equity, the same folks who once wrangled companies like DSLnet and Matrix Telecom into line. The press release paints a dreamy future of debt-free balance sheets, explosive infrastructure growth, and customers so happy they won’t even notice their provider just got privatized harder than a Cold War satellite.

Anuvu’s CEO, Josh Marks, wants us to believe this is all about tax simplification and operational clarity. Because when a company restructures itself into separate subsidiaries mid-acquisition, that always ends well, right? Just ignore the fine print about FCC licenses being transferred and the strategic ambiguity surrounding those MicroGEO satellites, clearly this is about innovation, not asset flipping.

Meanwhile, the usual suspects, Apollo, Mudrick, Eaton Vance, are quietly packing their bags, no doubt thrilled that Platinum has come to rescue whatever value might still be extracted from a company whose last reinvention was born out of bankruptcy.

No word on how Southwest Airlines, Anuvu’s flagship customer, feels about this. But nothing screams “continuity” like a complete change of ownership, legal structure, and operational backend. Maybe the next IFE screen update will come with a new investor presentation instead of a movie.