Oh great, just what we needed, another glossy satellite terminal that “redefines what’s possible.” Introducing Hydra MAX: now with not one, but two 500 MHz beams, so your tanks, drones, or boats can channel the magic of a microwave oven mounted on the move. Because nothing says high-tech like gigahertz junkets through the Ka-band.

But wait, Hydra MAX does full-duplex across multiple orbits simultaneously (switching beams is so last decade). In fact, the CTO practically shouted, “We’re redefining reality here!” And they’re not bluffing, this big honking 86 cm dish is rugged enough for artillery-grade potholes, delivering beams at a blistering 400 Hz. Perfect for those speed bumps on the way to nowhere.